May 2, 2018

Dear Dr. Cherrye: My son has the right to remain inside the school.

By: Cherrye S. Vasquez, Ph.D.

Q & A

DEAR DR. CHERRYE:

My son decided not to take part in the national school walk-out on gun safety because he strongly up-holds the Second Amendment and the Right to Bear Arms. Due to his stance, he was severely bullied and taunted at school for non-participation in the walk-out. I feel that the students involved in the bullying incident got by with a ‘slap on the hand’ by school/district officials, and this may happen again in similar incidents.

I am both frustrated and shocked about this entire incident.

-------- Frustrated and Shocked

DEAR  FRUSTRATED AND SHOCKED:

Your son had every right to his decision of non-participation in the national school walk-out. Children must be taught that every person has a right to their own opinions regarding matters, and hot topics we face, and just because someone does not agree with another’s ideals doesn’t give them the right to bully, taunt or coerce.

Administrators both at the local and district level should be contacted immediately, along with the parents of the perpetrators, to discuss this serious matter.  I’d also recommend school officials spend time addressing matters such as these via Mandatory School Open Forums and making all students, along with their parents aware of a Zero Tolerance Policy moving forward.

OPEN FOR COMMENTS

IMPORTANT!

I've made it my mission to assist parents in resolving the bullying issues their children are suffering. Offering your feedback and suggestions in the comment section could facilitate meaningful dialog on this critical issue among ourselves and I encourage this. I will respond to each comment in a timely way. Should you wish to speak privately with me, please email me at CherryeVasquez@gmail.com, and I will reply promptly.

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NO BULLY ZONE - INTERVIEW

NO BULLY ZONE

It was my pleasure to be interviewed by Ruth Kenneth (Mom, Former Teacher, and Curriculum Developer).

An interview that takes the reader deeper into tough questions about  bullying.

Topic: How to Create a No Bully Zone

Click Here to Access Link

In the Interim - The meeting with the Principal isn't until next week! What can I do now?

IN THE INTERIM

Okay, so now you’ve made your appointment to speak directly to the school Principal – the ‘head honcho’ in charge.  Remember, this meeting is far too important to speak to anyone else.

In the meantime, your child is still in shambles nervously attending school, or begging you to let them remain at home.  You might ask: “How do you help your child between your scheduled meeting, and the date/time of your meeting?”

HERE’S HOW

First, you need to let your child know with certainty, that you WILL intervene. Your goal is to become their ‘mouth piece’ and you will see that the bullying behaviors against him/her will end, and soon.

Your child should feel at ease that things will soon change, and for the better. You will see the burden lifted from your child’s shoulders as you console and assure them that YOU are not only listening, but YOU affirm immediate action toward peace for them.

You should also let your child realize whatever they may feel as the lowest most embarrassing thing that ever happen(s/ed) to them, they can overcome it. Most people endure embarrassment from time-to-time, wishing some things never happened, but at times things just happen. 

·         Tell your child NEVER let the Bully win.

·         Tell your child to be their own leader. 

·         Tell your child to Never let a bully manipulate them.

·         Tell your child NEVER allow a Bully to control their thoughts and/or feelings.

With practice and effective role-modeling, your child can learn to look past inappropriate, mean taunts and messages meant to hurt their feelings and demean them. 

PARENTS

Begin invoking Affirmation messages and Self-Fulfilling Prophecy sayings with your child. Your child needs to hear you say that the negative, unwarranted actions being placed on him/her is definitely not normal, and is not their fault. Affirmation builds self-esteem and heightens self-identity.  

AFFIRMATIONS

Affirmations makes children feel good about themselves, and affirmations empowers children past anything a bully can ever incite upon them. 

Trust me: Affirmations and Self-fulfilling Prophecy Techniques CAN change the focus of what children achieve, what they want to achieve, and what they hope achieve. Affirmations help build a child’s inner strength, and faith in themselves over time.

Regardless of what some researchers may say, Affirmations do not give children false empowerment. You must do whatever you can to SAVE YOUR CHILD. Besides, isn’t it true? Isn’t your child wonderful? So, ask them to:

REPEAT AFTER ME                                                   

·         I am worthy

·         I am beautiful                                    

·         I am self-confident

·         I am empowered

·         I have self-pride

·         I am smart  

·         I have great social skills 

·         I am talented

NOTE

Whatever you do - Let your child realize that YOU respect them, and that they are worth your intervention.

Question: “Okay, now I’ve met with the Principal, Dr. Cherrye, and you assured me that the Principal would be all ears, but guess what? This Principal is stubborn, and chooses not to listen to me.  What next?”

My answer: Don’t worry. I’ll tell you exactly what to do, so stay tuned for my next blog.

REMINDER

Please ensure that you grab, and download your two FREEBIES. Invite your friends and family who has children dealing with Bullying and Self-esteem issues to grab these freebies, too.

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